“Disregard what others think and the prison door will swing open.” ~Lao Tzu
You’ve heard the saying “what others think about me is none of my business” right? I have been thinking about a deeper concept. The 20-40-60 rule. For sure because I am knocking on 60’s door!
In our 20’s and 30’s we tend to be consumed by what other people think. We dress, talk, act, spend, engage, and even view ourselves through the lenses of public opinion. Social media has exacerbated this I am sure.
In our 40’s and 50’s, we start to care less about what people think. I call these years the F-you 50’s for this reason. With each day that passes, I feel more liberated as I worry less about what you think about me.
But here’s the kicker. In our 60’s something magical happens. We look back, and realize that exactly no one was thinking about us all along. No. One. They were all busy worrying about what others thought about them! Ugh.
What a waste of time, energy, and years that could have been spent on self love and liberation! Why can’t we know this in our earlier decades?
If I can share anything with my younger friends, it is this. The prison of others’ approval is actually one built by you, maintained by you, and guarded by you. It may have started in Junior High by the mean girl, or bully who was probably more insecure than anyone. That was then. If you are still stuck in the prison of shame and fear of judgment, remember that you hold the key to your own freedom.
I challenge you. Speak up. Speak out. Take up some space and stop apologizing. Please don’t wait until you are 60 to find your authentic voice, and use it for good in the world. Start with safe spaces, and people. Like me, and here. Comment and speak your truth. I am listening, and cheering you on!
U already know u are my favorite human in the whole wide world!!!! I really want to be a sliver of u when I grow up!!!!
You are my mentor when it comes to speaking up and speaking out. I am so grateful for our friendship.
LOVE this❣️Just now learning how to speak my truth. It’s never too late to embody our authentic selves. Thank you for bravely showing the way.🙏🏽
You have always shown me how to communicate with compassion and truth. Thank you for being in my life.
How did you know? THIS was exactly the reminder I needed to hear. Thank you lovely, for speaking your truth and sharing your mind. 💕
Thank you Toria. I am happy to hear that I am not alone in this struggle. Today is a new day. Let’s live it our way!
I turned 62 in June. Your words ring so true. It’s a liberating space. It’s been a place that, for me is a place I now appreciated.
Thank you for reminding us it’s okay to take up space and not always have to apologize for EVERYTHING! I’m definitely in my f-you, f-this and that 50s but I still feel like some judge me for it and it makes me anxious. I care what they think!
Love, love, love you Denise!
We’ll said friend. Welcome to the season of liberation.
Take up some space girl! The world needs more of that bright light!!!